 lindenlea: Have all the other retired posters died - it's quieter than ever on here.
I must admit I forget to look in! I tend to use the 'lifestyle' section most - yet 'retirement' comes under the 'role' umbrella for some odd reason. Retirement is a lifestyle for us now...surely...not a role in school? Ah well - something for the TES bods to ponder. It sounds awful to say this but life is a little easier these days because I have lost one side of the sandwich in that both parents have died. However, because I had old parents (Mum had me at 40 and her last child at 43) my caring for parents days were in my 30s and 40s when my children were young and I was still in full-time work...and a single parent.. That was so stressful, life was hectic and exhausting and I was being pulled in so many directions at once. It took it's toll. It's a shame in many ways they aren't around now, as I'd have more freedom to be there for them. Having said that, much as I loved them, elderly parents can be hard work, demanding and time-consuming as I am sure some of you know now. I still feel tied to the 'youngsters' though..because sadly they are not fully (financially) independent young men. Well - they are in a way. I am unable to help them financially but I keep this house on for them. It's the family home and their base still. Their lifestyles and comings and goings and job-hunts/work, woes, high-spots, doldrums, ill-health, joys, relationship situations etc affect life in the house and often impact on me. I am getting to the stage where I would like to be able to focus on me and my (live out) partner100%...as another poster mentioned. (Sorry I can't scroll up for a name.) Being 'self-contained' as she mentioned sounds quite blissful! I found it quite hard to loosen the apron strings when they were finding independence. I felt quite redundant and a bit lost/uneeded and almost invisible, but those feelings pass, we adjust and now I think I am ready to throw away the apron! If only! Having said that, we do jog along together quite well. We all get along for the most part and come together at Christmas. It won't always be like this. They'll have better fish to fry eventually, but yes, they ought to think themselves lucky that their Christmas has been organised for them and their part in getting 'the show on the road' has been minimal...My daughter has been extremely helpful and we'll share the cooking/entertaining load on the big day....not because we feel it's our role, but because it's often easier to just get on with it than organise others! Partner cooks a mean roast dinner though....every Sunday...and he deserves a day off! I am actually hoping all the young people (partner's son included) will want to escape after a while and leave me and the man to a bit of peace, perfect peace. Having said that I expect we'll snooze in front of the TV! When life does quieten down and everyone is busy and we are left alone and probably forgotten about for much of the time...do you think we'll miss the comings and goings, the dramas, concern, hustle and bustle and organisation that life (or just Christmas) entails right now?
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